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6 Things You Could Do In Nassau w/ an Ambulance

6 Things You Could Do In Nassau w/ an Ambulance

Well, over the weekend I am sure most of you through some news avenue or the other (aka Bahama News Ma Bey READ MORE HERE ) heard about the guy who attempted to steal an ambulance from the PMH medics who thought they came to attend to him. Now we are not here to endorse crime of any sort but we here at eLIFE 242 thought for one second that we should dive into the mind of this Bahamian ‘Criminal Master Mind’ and bring you “6 Things You Could Do In Nassau w/ an Ambulance”

1. Get from out east to out west in under 10 minutes – If you are like most Bahamians who live on the eastern portion of Nassau, I am sure you can see the value in this. Ever wanted to go have a drink at Compass Point but thought about that dreaded traffic light and round about ridden drive, that could possibly take 25 minutes. Well with an ambulance and sirens blazing you could cut that trip down extensively and enjoy life on the less populated side of our little rock
ambulance_move
2. Help Your Friend Move in One Trip –  We all got that one friend who always needs help moving, and the locations and the reasonings for moving keep changing. Either the Suga Daddy cut her off or the landlord wife stop letting her be behind on the rent. No matter the reasoning with the spacious wagon an ambulance will provide you can tuck all of her earthly belongings in for a quick one trip move and *poof* like magic you got your afternoon back.
ambulance_Ice
3. Turn it into one Bad A** Ice Cream Truck – Listen if this is the business plan homie had when he decided to steal the ambulance, I think Perry should pardon him 🙂 I mean dude was gonna be doing his part for the economic growth of the country, and an ice cream truck at this point is 10x times better than Bahamar on anything else the PLP has tried. I mean just think about how many coolers dude could fit in that bad boy and plus you would be able to hear him coming from like two hoods over.
ambulance_prom

4. Hide It Until Prom Season 2016, and take your lil bro to prom in style – I mean seriously this had to be one of the thoughts he had, I mean what else was he thinking. This guy must have really never had a childhood and wanted to live vicariously through his lil bro and obviously he needed close to a year to customize it with 22inch rims and a Honda logo.

5. Get home in time to watch Empire – Pretty self explanatory for the peeps who are still not streaming their favorite series on demand and with the upcoming season of “Empire” closer than ever having that handy dandy ambulance at your beck and call to weave through 5′ oclock traffic on Shirley Street is a plus. Get home in time to take care of your wifely duties (all of them 😉 ) and leave your self enough time to sit down and mindlessly enjoy your favorite new alternative to “Scandal”.

6. Personally deliver your Crazy BF/GF to Sandilands – This one just happens to be our personal favorite 🙂 What better way to get express access to the Sandilands compound than with your own ambulance. Bypass all the back and forth with the security at the gate and just whisk that crazy boy/girl friend right to the front door and roll them out on a gurney into what you would hope to become the only place you will ever have to see them.

So was this criminal hella stupid or evil genius ??? We may never know, nevertheless we hope this list causes you to question your own morals.(Well not really) Though if you ever do happen across an ambulance with the engine running you got a head start on good ideas.

© 2020 eLIFE 242 Magazine. All Rights Reserved.

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